Tuesday, January 8, 2019

Happy New Year

I am very happy to see the end of 2018 and welcome a brand new year. I know it has all the same issues and challenges that were there a few days ago, but there's just something about a brand new year - all shiny and bright with promise!

My 'Christmas for One' was somewhat successful. Xmas Eve was quite nice: I turned off my phone, turned up my favorite Xmas music and prepped for dinner. Then I spent the remainder of Xmas Eve watching TV or Netflix in front of my faux fire. My Beef Wellington for one was not successful; while the beef was great, the puff pastry didn't cook all the way through. I guess it really needs to be made for a group and not just for one or two.  But the bottle of wine and the aged cheddar with ginger were divine!

Xmas morning was equally nice. I was pleasantly surprised by one or two of my 'Santa' gifts that I'd forgotten about. And it was nice to sit in my pj's with a delicious latte and chat with my absent daughters. 

My 42 years of NS christmases' did not at all prepare me for what seems to be the norm here. The various hurts, upsets and drama that seem to make up the weekly lives of my family also came to the surface a few days before the big day; and unfortunately, everyone gets caught in the crossfire! So in spite my plans and my best intentions, Xmas dinner was not really very relaxing! Nevertheless, I hummed through the difficult parts and tried to put my best foot forward : and after I put in my 4-5 hours, I quickly returned to the sanctuary and peace of my own little apartment.

The rest of the season was spent immersed in jigsaws, chocolate, cheese and snow. In spite of occasional sadness, I really enjoyed my solitude and spent my time creating hygge w/ candlelight, calming spa-type music (interspersed with some time to dance to rock 'n' roll), yoga and brief walks in the snow. I also baked cookies, ate chips and dip, and organized my closet & recipe binders.  It was a productive holiday season. 

Still, ain't it good to get back to everyday life which for me means rising before 7 am, sitting at work with a good coffee and my usual breakfast oatmeal, chatting with clients and co-workers about the real issues of life while helping them get back on their feet, then a quiet dinner at home, my evening phone calls, and a little Netflix.  THAT is my life, not the chaos that can arise from others' lives. 

While it is around me and can sometimes touch me, it is NOT me.



Sandi said...

a lot of wisdom in this, Sandy....seeking peace is a good thing!

Jack Tyler said...

Sounds like a bittersweet experience . . . and aren't those really the best? A happy and calm 2019 to you, Milady!

Jeanie said...

I think for the post part, a very hygge Christmas! Here's to a wonderful 2019!

Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe said...

We all have to find our own peace and that often means staying away from toxic people. I am glad that your holidays, minus four or five hours, were good for you.

Susan said...

Toxic families, what a pain. I've raised my children very differently and sounds like you have too. Glad you had a good Christmas otherwise.

Vonlipi said...

I wish you a very healthy and peaceful 2019!

I know a thing or 2 (really a thousand) about toxic families....My Mom's family disappeared after her death and my Dad's well, I've always felt like an outsider and I would spend energies trying to fit in but nothing worked. When he passed, none of his cousins bothered to send a note or a text yet I heard they complained that I did not plan a memorial lunch.
and I am afraid I burned the last bridge last night when I refused to give or sell some family furniture to my cousin. My Dad left her some money, I gave her a lot of furniture, paintings, Xmas decor and even loaned her money that she never repaid...so that was it.

I am turning myself towards 2019 , bright eyed and hopeful!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

They say that life is what we make it and it sounds like you are doing what is best for you. My home is my peaceful place too and I never mind being home alone. Although I do love my family, It's nice to get home where it is quiet and cozy. Happy New Year, may it be the best ever !

Valerie said...

Hi, I popped in to thank you for visiting my blog. Like you I spent Christmas alone (aside from the 'visitor' I wrote about) and after three years without my man I am adjusting to a solo Christmas. I thank God for giving me good neighbours. New Year greetings.