Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Shopping with "The Girls"

I had to do it, ladies! Egad!! I was down to the last seconds on my 18 hour bra! So, last week, I ventured out to shop for a new one.
In my younger days, I used to have lovely 'proud, jutting breasts'! (I read that line once in one of those risque Harlequin romance novels and just loved the sound of it. It's so patrotric sounding, isn't it! So very British! And it perfectly describes the bras of the 60's and early 70's!)
But as with all else in this aging process, time is taking it's cruel toll. They no longer jut nor stand proud! As a matter of fact, if they could talk to me, they'd speak in a rather sheepish voice and say things like "Oh! We're so sorry! We didn't mean to get in the way again!" or "Pardon us please! Yes, we'll take ourselves out of that bowl you're stirring immediately!".
So, off I went to my local Zeller's store in search of a combination Catholic/Salvation Army type of bra! (The Catholic type supports the masses, the Salvation Army type lifts up the fallen ....... and the Baptist type makes mountains out of mole hills.)
All around me was color & pattern & softness -- a virtual cornucopia of femininity, prettiness and sex appeal! Such a selection! Surely every woman would find just what she needed in her style and price range.


Why is it so hard to find a pretty bra in a larger size that will give support and won't cost you next week's grocery budget? It's not as if there isn't a market out there for them, right. I mean, big breasts are global (pun intended)! But most bras that will give support are pretty darned ugly!

I want pretty. But what I need is a cowboy bra -- one that rounds up those babies and heads them in the right direction! Rawhide! -- Ahhhh, no thanks! Nylon, elastic and lace please!
I need a bra something like this one:without the visible cranes and guywires, of course!


The plight of the full-figured woman!!

My usual bra is not too bad; and in spite of wanting something different, it's what I ended up buying again. It fits and supports well; it was a 2 for 1 sale; and I was able to get a pretty pink one as well as the tidy white! *
And you know; as much as I tend to look on "the girls" with chagrin, I know it could be worse.

I could be shopping for this baby!!!


Garden of Egan said...

Sheesh you're cracking me up!!!!
My girls are not behaving either. They don't stand at attention.

I'm having bra issues too. I hate them.
I'm not really big enough to need a bra, but it's disgusting if I don't.
I want a comfy one that doesn't bind and the straps don't fall down.
Any ideas?

I love the picture with the crane holding stuff up. said...

a friend of mine recently went to a bra store and when the sales lady asked what size she was she answered "38 long" lol

Linda said...

I have recently found a bra I like that corrals and lifts the girls. Cheap it is not but worth it.


I wear The Body by Victoria.. A little pricey. But, it has memory foam in the swells. They like to remember being high and tight and so do I.

Liane said...

This is so funny 'cause I usually only go shopping when mine are tattered and falling apart (the bras!) and I can never remember what size I wear and end up going around and around the 'unmentionables' until I end up buying the same cheap ones I always get....
Your blog is hilarious!
Have a great day!

Suburban Princess said...

I wear that same bra but one without the underwire - so it is the same but without the wire...I really think it is the best bra out there! I have been wearing warners since I was a teen and have tried lots of other but keep going back to my old standby!

Sandy aka Doris the Great said...

Stampernancy - I like that sizing. I may have to use that!

The Looking Glass - What the heck are "the swells"? Memory foam sounds lovely & soft; however, if they remember what my breasts look like now, I'd just as soon they forget. Also, the thought of adding foam to my bra and increasing my size to a 62KK is not appealing.

Linda - Spit it out: what and where is that expensive bra?

Anita said...

I have the problem of not being able to wear my correct size without special ordering. So I usually just buy whatever will fit and have to deal with rolling up and pinching. Thanks for a laugh today! Hope you have a great one!

Sarah @ Mum In Bloom said...

Thanks for following my blog today. I'm still so flattered when this happens :) You are so funny! This bra post had me laughing out loud! After so many years, how can bra shopping still be so confusing, eh?

Judy said...

This is really weird...I shopped for a brassiere this weekend also...went to Kohl's and Meijers...all of the new ones seem to be pre-formed...I want to look like me, not like a bra...what ever happened to the soft cups and no underwire??? sheesche...

Chris said...

Shopping I love...bra shopping I hate! I have never had a bra the was comfortable, even after "professional" fitting.

Thanks for the giggles!

Barbara said...

Tell me about it!! Try finding a 40DD that doesn't look like a bullet proof vest. I want one that pushes them in from the sides...good luck with that!!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

We all have to do it sometimes! I've gone to comfort in all things, bras included. Push outs and wires are a thing of the past. Enjoy a wonderful Wednesday!

reasonably chubby said...

I laughed my head off...again! As a fellow 'bountiful busted' woman, (if you say that in a husky voice it sounds really nice) I feel your pain! What's really weird is that I was just thinking this morning, its time to go bra shopping. Which I hate to do, since I always end up getting the same ol' same ol. I think I'll try the kind you got. It'll be our little secret-we wear matching bras! :)

Nezzy said...

I've got to take the plunge myself. Warners has discontinued the bra I've loved for years so I'm gonna be out there searchin'.

Ya had me rollin' in the floor girl! Your just too funny.

Have a good one!!!

susan said...

My "girls" are Presbyterian and know that their fate was predestined :)

Maureen said...

Too funny! You're as crazy as a bedbug. (In a good way, of course!)

Eva Gallant said...

Lately my girls have taken to staring at the floor!

Loved this post! Very funny!

Kate said...

I just guffawed. Too too funny. I'm at a double disadvantange -- I need a big supportive bra that also allows access for feeding a little one. Nothing nice out there.

Su-sieee! Mac said...

Hilarious! I think it would fun wearing one of those crane-holding bras--over my top. Thanks for the laugh. Very much needed today. :-)

Su-sieee! Mac said...

P.S. I just added you to my blog roll at :-)

One Wish said...

I hear ya Sandy..I hate to go buy's torture!